I often wonder if I made the right decisions. If who I am dealing with during my daily life is the people I should be with. Or if I am making some odd mistake that while I know it deep down, my heart has not one clue. Blinded by the laughter and the occasional alcohol, I see my friends make these crazed decisions. I am not pointing fingers at anyone, but do I see those, the ones who are not currently in college, making money for themselves, as I watch them diddle with careless things, are those the ones I really want to associate myself with? Because I am a college student, do I automatically look at my college buds are higher ups than my graduated high school-but-now-I-only-work-at-fast-food? Maybe I am being biased. Such a terrible thing for me to do but is that the way I want to look at people? Look at their education and base their life, their values on that? Maybe I really do value education in it's truest form and urge everyone to have a good one. That's just who I am, I guess.
While watching the Iron Lady, I saw Margaret Thatcher's character progressively become old throughout the movie. (Okay, well she's been old in the beginning, but it's kind of a back and fourth sort of thing where it rewinds to the past, then fast forwards, all that crazy cinematic bs.) I thought how I had friends when I was younger. Never saw them again. I thought how I had friends in high school. Only a few remain. I look at my friends at college. I think about my future friends, maybe ones that I meet at a bookstore. Friends I may meet at work. Friends I might meet while traveling. How can I possibly keep them all? Facebook surely cannot do the trick. Sometimes, I am happy that I am living in the moment. Taking in every opportunity possible. Yet, I think about the future and often wonder, are these people, the people whom I interact with, will they be in my future? Will they be there for my wedding? My funeral? Growing old kind of freaks me out. How will I react when I find out the death of a loved one? I cannot possibly bare to think about it. I cannot live without my sister or my grandparents. I really don't want to think about such things - yet, life, it's inevitable. My life is such a hurricane. I make an impact somewhere and the damage is easy to clean up. Life goes on and you forget about the hurricane.
Five years from now, I will not be Student Body President. I will just be that hurricane. I made some changes, but it will be on to the next person and my name will just be a distant fragment on a piece of paper. A bill or something. Easily forgotten. But if you look hard enough, I'll be there.
While watching the Iron Lady, I saw Margaret Thatcher's character progressively become old throughout the movie. (Okay, well she's been old in the beginning, but it's kind of a back and fourth sort of thing where it rewinds to the past, then fast forwards, all that crazy cinematic bs.) I thought how I had friends when I was younger. Never saw them again. I thought how I had friends in high school. Only a few remain. I look at my friends at college. I think about my future friends, maybe ones that I meet at a bookstore. Friends I may meet at work. Friends I might meet while traveling. How can I possibly keep them all? Facebook surely cannot do the trick. Sometimes, I am happy that I am living in the moment. Taking in every opportunity possible. Yet, I think about the future and often wonder, are these people, the people whom I interact with, will they be in my future? Will they be there for my wedding? My funeral? Growing old kind of freaks me out. How will I react when I find out the death of a loved one? I cannot possibly bare to think about it. I cannot live without my sister or my grandparents. I really don't want to think about such things - yet, life, it's inevitable. My life is such a hurricane. I make an impact somewhere and the damage is easy to clean up. Life goes on and you forget about the hurricane.
Five years from now, I will not be Student Body President. I will just be that hurricane. I made some changes, but it will be on to the next person and my name will just be a distant fragment on a piece of paper. A bill or something. Easily forgotten. But if you look hard enough, I'll be there.
