Hats

Wow.

I haven't updated as much. I blame insanity.

Honestly. I think everyday I am becoming crazier and crazier. I really wish I could go back in time when I was younger. Though, with my current mood, as I think of my past, I think of all the bad times I've endued. The pain that I suffered and the nights I spent in the basement. I wish I had someone here to listen to my screams, but they all ended up silent.

I wish it was freshman year. I wish I could have made better decisions. I wish I said "No" to this one person. And said "Yes" to the other. I wish I cared more. There is always time for progress, but I have a feeling that it will be too late. I sometimes feel that I can't confine to anyone anymore. I mean, I have friends but they are away. I wish there was someone who I can walk up and cry to. Someone who would know in an instant that I'm sad and will try their best to make me laugh and smile. Rather than walk away and ignore me for a few hours. It's clear that in their vocal tone, they don't care.

I'll be better soon. I'll be in Hershey, Pennsylvania in less than 24 hours and I'll be far away from him. I just have to avoid him on Wednesday.

In times like these, I would like to drive somewhere far away. Or, I could just start running.